Frustrated that their skills are largely ignored by the hero-worshipping adolatory babes, mathematicians (few of them) have started flexing their muscles by solving the one problem that mystifies all, one that of beer head.
“It’s exhilarating,” Srolovitz (the math guy) says. “I’ve always found this problem very sexy.”
Sexy or not, complex equations certainly provide a tantalizing hint at a future without beer-head; an elysium of free flowing beer on clean table tops.
Who knew that the solution to heady problem boils down to a single equation,
“According to the new equation, the change in volume….is essentially the sum of the lengths of the domain’s edges (imagine a honeycomb) minus six times the mean width of the domain, all multiplied by a constant that is particular to the material in question.”
The material in question, of course, being beer, the one beverage (other than water) that man and dog like alike.
But before we start celebrating, solving the equation could be harder than what your local bartender could tackle.
“‘It’s a very complicated type of evolution,”… “It’s going to be much harder to figure out how the network behaves.'”
But if that doesnt convince young kids to take up maths, then I dont know what will. Previous approaches to beer zen have involved undergoing rigorous physical training, as in the example here.
Math seems so much better.
Its a bad sign for the world that even before super-heroes are discovered, their nemesis are (literally) unearthed.
“The collective laughter of Lex Luthor, Brainiac and a host of other DC Comics villains was heard reverberating throughout Metropolis this morning, according to the Daily Planet.”
Such scientific insight comic-book writers have, and I detect a frustrated chemist lay hidden beneath. Real scientists, however, are more dull. Like the discoverer of Jaderite, Dr Chris Stanley, who proposes very non-super uses for the mineral:
“Borosilicate glasses are used to encapsulate processed radioactive waste, and lithium is used in batteries and in the pharmaceutical industries.”
The happenings at VTech on Monday April 16th have numbed the senses; not because of the magnitude and nature of the crime, condemnable and heart-breaking as they are, but because of the inevitably irrational response it has provoked within different sections of internet communities – news media, blogs.
This irrationality has been summarized in this sharp post by Curious Gawker, which is cuttingly succinct. The same lines will be relevant the next time such a massacre (and NOT a tragedy) occurs.
The killing had nothing in common with a tragedy, except having an unhappy ending; the rest was a combination of malice and negligence, which left unchecked, will repeat again. Bhopal was a tragedy; but VTech, like Khmer Rouge, 9/11 and Columbine (and many depressingly others), was not. The victims in the latter suffered and died as a result of hatred and/or mental imbalance, where lies the tragedy in that? They were executed, massacred, murdered, anything but died tragic deaths. Calling it a tragedy sanitizes the event, giving it a feel of a misfortune which was terrible but unforeseeable, like an earthquake or tsunami. This was and should have been avoidable.
If anything, Cho’s decline from an (apparently) normal childhood in an (apparently) normal family, into a murderous raging youth can be construed as a tragedy. But that is unlikely to happen.
Unabashedly inspired from Vikram Seth’s “Round and Round“ ;
Stood forlorn in the shimmering dusk
As her shadow faded away
And the words he thought say she must
They never came his way
Ahead his dreams lay scattered
For just when it mattered
He couldn’t say it himself;
Wept as she walked in the melting snow
He didn’t ask her to stay
The state of her heart, she had told him though
Albeit from some yards away
For the words she had uttered
They’d tossed and they fluttered
And in the wind, were they swept away ;